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There is a popular misconception that catnip is weed for felines. To that rumor, I offer a resounding "bullshit!" In my experience, Mary Jane makes you about as ambitious as moss, m'kay? People don't see a hyper, out of control person and ask if they are "hopped up" on boo-ya shwag. Catnip has a polar opposite effect on our furry kitty friends.
Catnip has got to be more like cocaine for cats. Recently, Trusty unwittingly suggested that we purchase some catnip-laced toys for our cat, Miss Mia. One day, Mia was taking hits off her catnip mouse as I shut myself into the bathroom for a relaxing shower. I quickly became alarmed when the cat began throwing herself at the closed door. She was jumping and thrashing high enough off the floor to hit the doorknob. I was afraid of what the drugs may cause her to do if she managed to bodyslam the door in, so I hurried for the sanctuary of the shower, fairly certain that I could deter her potential attacks with the water from the detachable shower head.
When the hot water ran out, I exited the shower and listened. Silence. I didn't know what to think. Had she slipped into a catnip coma? Had she went into cardiac arrest? Had all her door thumping rendered her uncoscious? Or was she simply laying in wait, poised and ready to pounce on me as soon as I opened the door? I had to take a chance. I refused to hide in the bathroom until Trusty got home. Plus, my vanilla Pepsi was in the living room. I slowly opened the door.
She was on the top bunk of the bunk beds. I had no idea how she'd gotten there. At that point, she had apparently sobered up while atop Mount Bunk and was no longer stoned enough to find a way down, as she kept walking the perimeter of the mattress, looking down and crying. I have since figured out how she got/gets up there--she gets high and climbs the ladder, just as any other parent of a catnip addict might expect.
I've tried hiding her catnip toys. I've even tried throwing them away, but apparently catnip contains a claw fortifier. She's clawed Mia sized holes through the door, trashcan and all the cabinets. I have no choice but to send her to catnip rehab while most of our interior walls are still standing.
Consider this a public service message. Catnip is not like marijuana for cats. Ignore the rumors and take my word for it.
design by fergie
Bits of fire in the sky push me east back home. I used to live in flames
but it's hard on the wings. Choke me. Smoke me. Scare me back. You try
but you just can't. I peel the layers in my spare time, and you're easy
to see through. I can fly, I've discovered on my own. I may be the lesser
butterfly but my wings are just as strong. Who are you to tell me to find
a place to land? I may be the lesser butterfly but baby watch me glide.
